Meet the ultimate parents

The Soelberg children say their parents are supportive, uplifting, understanding — and have lots of patience.

The Mesa family gathers every Sunday for a large dinner, reserves Mondays as family night and spends Saturdays working around the house.

Raising 13 children is no small feat. But for Carol and Glade Soelberg, they fill their home with love, the Mormon faith and a different discipline approach.

The couple were named the 2005 Arizona Parents of the Year on July 28 by the Parents Day council. The award is given to parents who are "loving, consistent, involved, motivating, courageous and who serve as role models." It is given in conjunction with the U.S. recognition of the fourth Sunday in July designated as "Parents Day."

Susan Duffin of Mesa nominated the Soelbergs for the award. She has been a family friend for 19 years.

"They’re just outstanding parents," said Duffin, who has seven children. "They’ve taught their children to be courageous, to be honest, to stand up for things. I feel like with my association with them, I am a better wife and mother."

Carol and Glade Soelberg met in 1967 while attending Brigham Young University in Utah. Two years later they were married, and after Glade served three years in the Army, the couple moved to Mesa.

Carol Soelberg, 57, is a fulltime homemaker and president of United Families Arizona, an organization that advocates and educates on family values. Glade Soelberg, 60, is a residential contractor.

The Soelberg children range in age from 11 to 35. Four live at home, nine are married and four of them live in Mesa with their families. There are 26 grandchildren.

Alan Soelberg said that despite the large family, his parents always treated each child as if they were a favorite.

"I never felt that there wasn’t enough time for me," said the 24-year-old law student, who is married with a daughter and another daughter on the way. "My dad very rarely ever raised his voice, and knowing how my mom confided in me and trusted me, I always made the right decisions so as not to disappoint her."

The thing that has most influenced Carol Soelberg about her family is the realization that her children are all "innately good." She believes that discipline should be an extension of teaching.

"Discipline changes from punishing to teaching," she said. "I always say my kids come to me really good, I just try hard not to mess them up."

Work ethic is important in the Soelberg family. All the children who are old enough have graduated from a university, all the children have musical training and can play the piano and sing, all the boys were involved in Boy Scouts, and all the girls were in student government.

Ashlyn Soelberg, the second youngest child at 14, said her parents have "lots of patience and are hard workers."

"Everything they teach us, they teach us by example," said Ashlyn, a freshman at Poston Junior High School. "They give up so much of their time for the family, no matter what else is going on. That time is so important to us."