Private karaoke rooms lure hams out of closet

I love karaoke, but I don't delude myself: It's not exactly the coolest hobby on the block. As fantasy-fulfilling pastimes go, I can think of only two - "Star Trek" conventioneering and Civil War reenacting - that are more passionately shunned by the general population.

Yes, the karaoke stigma is real - but its days might be numbered, thanks in part to the private karaoke rooms at Geisha a Go Go in Scottsdale. Here, finally, is a singalong innovation so cool, even karaoke-phobes may catch the fever.

First, a little topical history. Like many amusing and/or useful technical gadgets, karaoke - translated as "empty orchestra" in Japanese - was conceived in the United States and refined in Asia. Soon after the invention of the first karaoke machines in the early 1970s, businesses called "karaoke boxes" began flourishing in Japan. These were karaoke joints that rented out private compartments by the hour. Basically, your own little karaoke kingdom.

When karaoke finally spread to North America in the early '90s, it was generally dispensed in bars by owner-operators who catered to an entire room full of people. The upside: It doesn't cost anything to sing. The downside: Sometimes you have to wait an hour or more to get on the stage.

Geisha a Go Go does it the Japanese way, charging anywhere from $30 to $100 per hour (depending on time of day and room size) for the exclusive use of one of its "boxes." I have to admit, the prospect of cramming a month's worth of singing into a single hour is making me a little tingly.

For Americans accustomed to open-floor-plan partying, it's an odd experience, to say the least. When the Geisha's karaoke hostess leads our group past a hallway of soundproof rooms, it feels somewhat shady, like we've wandered into an extremely high-end adult bookstore.

The "box" itself is also on the surreal side - cozy, brightly lit and utterly contained. Are we here to sing Springsteen or have our teeth cleaned? Décor-wise, it's hard to tell.

At first, the night plays out predictably. Those of us with karaoke passion hog the microphone, while the less performance-inclined politely demur. After butchering "Tainted Love," I belt out a "Light My Fire" that would make Val Kilmer's head explode. My brother does a priceless impersonation of Creed emoti-dork Scott Stapp.

Then something wonderful - dare I say, miraculous - happens: The karaoke party poopers, plied on Kirin beers and froufrou drinks, start to push their way on stage. I personally witness two women who would never be caught dead singing in a regular karaoke bar shriek out a duet of "Venus" and crumple laughing to the floor in a heap.

You see? Everyone likes being onstage. Some of us just don't like large crowds of strangers scrutinizing our off-key attempts to sing "Magic Man." In other words, if you want to deflower a karaoke virgin, the Geisha is absolutely your best bet in the Valley.

Quickly - depressingly quickly, actually - our time is up and we're given the option of buying another hour. I've heard from friends that the Geisha is fairly strict about enforcing its time limit rule, but the damnable thing is, none of us want to leave. I fear several karaoke addicts were born that night.

Geisha a Go Go

Where: 7150 E. Sixth Ave., Scottsdale

Hours: 4 p.m. to 2 a.m. (with food service until 10 p.m.) daily

Cost: Karaoke rooms are rented for $30-$100 a per hour

Information: (480) 699-0055.

Calendar: Check out Geisha A Go Go in the Events Calendar