He hasn’t texted back or e-mailed in, like, three hours. So when he said “ttyl,” exactly how much later did he mean? As if dating weren’t complicated enough, technology has given singles new ways to wonder just how much he (or she) is into you. Did he get the text or is he ignoring it? Did she mean to sign off Gchat immediately after you signed on?

“It has changed the dating scene because now you can basically know what the other person is doing at all times,” says 25-year-old Angie Murphy of Colorado Springs, Colo. “If a guy doesn’t respond to my Gchat or text, even though I know they are online or I know that they got my text, then it just makes me frustrated and question what is going on.”

So, is social networking technology — instant messaging, text messaging and sites such as MySpace — a blessing or a curse to the dating world?

Robert Scuka, a clinical social worker and executive director of the National Institute of Relationship Enhancement, sees both sides of the coin.

“One of the great benefits of the technology is it’s all a greater opportunity for connection when people are not able to be with one another physically,” says Scuka, whose nonprofit organization provides relationship training for health professionals and educators. “The potential downside is when people aren’t cautious. For example, it can foster unrealistic expectations for immediate responsiveness.”

He’s noticed the downside firsthand with some of his clients: “I’ve seen this in therapy, where one person, in my mind, had unrealistic expectations for the spouse to immediately respond to a text message, when the reality for the other spouse is that he was in a business meeting and it was not possible.”

Rapid response time isn’t the only issue surrounding couples who communicate by text, e-mail and instant messaging. Facial expressions and vocal cues get lost without a good face-to-face chat.

“I think it can be a really fun way to communicate, but you have to remember that it’s not always clear,” says etiquette expert Lizzie Post of the Emily Post Institute. “Humor is very hard to take in text messages. It takes a lot of crafting in terms of learning how to text-message effectively.”

It also takes a lot of getting-to-know-you beforehand, Post says. Relationships in their early stages — especially those between teens or 20-somethings, who are more likely to text than call — can easily fall apart when miscommunication comes into play.

“The dating world is confusing enough,” she says. “Trying to figure out somebody’s words on a page becomes very difficult, especially when you don’t know this person — you don’t know their tone.”

Murphy agrees.

“It is hard to know what the other person really means or is saying since you can’t tell by their tone if they are being sarcastic,” Murphy says. “It is difficult to know how to respond due to that.”

“Technology always has kind of an effect on how humans behave and interact,” says Michael Reay, visiting assistant professor of sociology at Colorado College. “But the effect it has will always depend on the values and norms.”

In layman’s terms: Don’t blame the cell phone or computer.

“It’s not a problem with the technology,” Scuka says. “It’s simply that technology, in effect, uncovers underlying psychological issues that other person may have. For example, dependency.”

You were bound to find out eventually.