Brownie Points: It's just not fair

As a fantasy football owner of Brian Westbrook, he’s officially off my Christmas card list after falling down on purpose short of the goal line Sunday in Dallas.

Read Jerry Brown's blog, Brownie Bytes

It was unselfish. It was a great lesson to kids everywhere. It was an example to his teammates. It was … oh, let’s be honest — it was the most infuriating moment of television since Howard Cosell left the air.

Hey, Brian, I know your Eagles have already been stuffed and mounted for this season, but some of us actually made playoffs, dude.

The only cool part: The Eagles turned down more touchdowns than the Cowboys scored.

HAZZARD-OUS INVITATIONS

There is no Bill Parcells to kick around anymore, so now when the Cowboys lose, their fanatics blame Tony Romo’s girlfriends?

Last year, Carrie Underwood was carved up after Dallas’ Thanksgiving Day defeat. Then Sunday, the 10-6 loss to the Eagles was pinned on new flame Jessica Simpson, who watched from a luxury box in a pink Romo jersey. The Dallas Morning News reported fans who waited for Romo to leave Texas Stadium — with his injured thumb heavily bandaged — were shouting suggestions that he concentrate on football, not women.

DEVILS IN THE DETAILS

First off, a correction from Sunday: While ASU’s win over Xavier was indeed its first home win over a ranked, nonconference opponent in 27 years, the Devils haven’t had many chances to break that streak. It turns out they hadn’t hosted a ranked foe out of conference since 1983, when then-No.18 UTEP beat them 60-55.

In 18 chances to beat a ranked foe out of conference (anywhere) since beating Ohio State in Tempe in 1980, ASU had been 3-15 prior to beating Xavier. Two of the wins came in the 1994 Maui Classic — when the Mario Bennett team that reached the Sweet 16 beat Michigan and Maryland — and the other came over Memphis in the 2003 NCAA tournament.

Despite the nasty first season, Herb Sendek is 2-3 against ranked teams at home — pretty good when you consider that from 1995-2006, ASU was 2-28 against ranked opponents at home.

QUICK HITTERS

• A horse named “Lute Oatson” ran in the first race at Turf Paradise on Monday. His prerace odds were 7-2, and he finished in the money (third). Like his namesake, he’s had a lot of success against foes in the Valley — although the four-legged version actually has to show up to work to get paid.

• Before we start talking about 70-win seasons for the Celtics, might I point out that their longest “road trip” so far has been two games? Let’s see how the Mean Green does out West.

• A game ball to Browns kicker Phil Dawson for kicking two field goals in a lake-effect blizzard in Cleveland. I bet this guy has a great short game on the golf course. On one kick, I truly believe he aimed toward the replay booth before twisting it between the uprights.

• By the way, a football team from Buffalo can’t function in the snow? Somewhere, Jack Kemp and Paul Maguire are hiding their faces.

• Andy Pettitte says he only used HGH for two days. That really sounds good, until you remember he denounced a Los Angeles Times story last year that said he was implicated by everybody’s favorite former Diamondback — Jason Grimsley — and said he’d never used performance-enhancing substances.

And then you remember a famous quote attributed to Pettitte: “Whatever I do, I love to win. I don’t care if it’s tennis or ping pong, I’ll kill myself to win it.”

• Brian Billick, who ran one of the most prolific offenses in NFL history in Minnesota, can’t go less than a yard against winless Miami and kicks a game-tying field goal? When will anyone go winless in the NFL, and join Tampa Bay in infamy? Quoth the Raven: Nevermore.